Category Archives: Life

Five reasons why you should say “I love you” to your parents

feet-261750_640When was the last time that you told your parents those three words…I love you.   If you had to think about it, then you are not saying it enough times.  How many of us have a difficult time saying those three words?  Now is the time to say them.

Here are the top five reason why you should say “I love you” to your parents:

1.  Parents reaction gets me every time.  Sometimes they’ll say “what do you want?” or they might say “I love  you too”.  I always get a kick out of seeing how they will react when I say it.  I made a promise when I was really young to always tell my parents that I love them no matter what.  That means even if I was upset at them as a teenager, I always said I love you.  Believe me that it was not always easy but I learned by watching others that I did not want to feel any regrets when it was time for them to go.

2.  Life is too short.  Sadly, you never know how long your parents will be around.  Don’t waste your time and minutes thinking that you will do this or that for them.  Because even if you don’t have the money, time is more precious and valuable than money.  Spend time with them and if you have grandparents go visit them as well.  I wish  I could still have my grandparents with me and I would do anything to have them around right now but I don’t so I just appreciate the loved ones around me now which include my parents.  Besides my kids and husband, my parents are a gift from heaven that God sent to us to teach us valuable lessons in life.

3.  A little bit of appreciation will go a long way with your parents.  When you show them appreciation, they will see that you have matured.  Perhaps I may be wrong with this idea, but I think that when  you learn to appreciate your parents for all the hard work that they did for you is the minute that you have learned the real value in life is being thankful for everyone and everything.

4.  Developing gratitude.  Sometimes we get so caught up with life that we forget how to be thankful and show a little bit of gratitude.  Don’t forget the people who sacrificed so much for you would love to hear a thank you from you; no amount of money or stuff can compare a sincere thank you from the heart.

5.  Besides saying thank you, nothing beats saying “I’m sorry”.  Taking a moment to say am sorry for all the headaches that you gave them goes a long way.  When you have that conversation with them, it’s a chat that you will never forget or regret.

Do you want to add more reasons why? or perhaps you want to share a story when you had those chats with your parents? I would love to hear stories or comments.

What are your thoughts on a red carpet @Joan Rivers funeral?

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After hearing about Joan Rivers death, I was deeply moved because I can’t imagine the way her daughter feels at this moment.  Then I saw the news about them having a red carpet at her funeral and it got me to think…Is there such a  thing as funeral etiquette?  Is it too old school to think that funerals are meant for a moment to reflect on the life of the person and not a moment to throw a big party or is it okay to throw a big party at the funeral?

Back in the days, I remember attending funerals and you could not even speak a word before someone gave you a glare but so much has changed now.  It’s now accepted when people throw parties at funeral or make more of an event rather than a funeral.

Regardless, what is the proper etiquette in funerals?  From my own experience and opinion, there are a few things to keep in mind when you do attend a funeral.

1.  Selfies at the funeral.  This one I still can’t grasp around this idea how people go to funerals and they start taking selfies with the deceased.  I mean really?  At first I thought it was a joke or a prank but it wasn’t at all; people were really taking selfies.  And not only with the deceased but they were also going around and taking selfies with people that they haven’t seen in a long time.  I understand that funerals can bring families and friends together but it is not a social butterfly scene and for you to start taking pictures with everyone.

2.  Turn the cell phones off.  I really do not know why is it so hard for some people to just remember that there needs to be some sort of peace, serenity and silence in a funeral.  It gives the person who is mourning a time to think or even grasp what is happening.  If the call is so important, then just stand up and go outside and take care of what you have to do but there is no reason why there needs to be a conversation inside the funeral home.

3.  Not being considerate to the feelings of the grieving family members.  One way this is shown is by talking and laughing too loud while there is silence in the room.  We don’t want to draw unnecessary attention to ourselves but to try to keep the focus and respect to the one that has passed away.  Usually at the end of the funeral, people do use the time to hello to old friends and family members that they haven’t seen in a long time.  In this case, more people are speaking and the noise level is raised as opposed to in the beginning of the funeral when it is usually quite.

Do you have a great story to share about improper manners at a funeral?  Please post comments below or go to Charis by Design facebook page so we can all join in the conversation.

 

Happy Grandparents day! What are your best memories?

1510792_10201333905055113_1247047629_nToday is National Grandparent’s Day and there is nothing sweeter than honoring them on this special day.  When I was younger, I had the privilege of having both of my grandmothers and grandfathers but for today I will speak of my grandparents who lived in New York City.  I loved both of my grandparents very dearly and have special memories of them in my heart.

My grandparents were Rosa and Victor Martinez and I wish they were still here today.  Both of my grandparents lived a remarkable life that inspired me greatly because they were missionaries to the church in the Dominican Republic.

They were the most patient, giving, helping, loving and attentive missionaries that I have met because they really took the time to serve others.  I remember my grandmother always happy and singing a hymn while she was washing dishes or cooking for others.  They were always ready to jump and help anyone who needed help.  All those strolls that we took together with all my cousins to the park will never be forgotten because that is when she would always say a story or quote something and take the time to talk and listen to us.  She always said to me “It’s important to listen to others because you don’t know what problem they may be going through”, and I have never forgotten her words.

As for my grandfather “Papa Victor”, he was never afraid to preach the gospel.  Always ready to share the good news and just talk to anyone who was ready to listen.  I miss his perspective on life and his gentle humor.  I miss the surprising depth of knowledge that he had without finishing school.

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For this reason I will always hold them close to my heart.  I could never or will never measure up to them.  I only wish I could be just a little of what they were for the family.  But for now, I miss them both very dearly and I will treasure their memories forever.

 

 

 

 

 

What are your best memories with your grandparents?

Happy Grandparents day!

Happy Saturday with love and laughter!

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School has started and family vacations are over! well at least technically…it really doesn’t have to end.  Why do we need to end such great family or friends moments?   Sometimes we (especially me) get so lost on running errands during the weekend because it’s the only time that we have to do everything that we miss on the most important thing…spending time with the ones you love.  Make them smile or laugh so hard until they can’t laugh anymore.

Don’t get wrapped up with chores but take the time to make each smile and laughter count! Your kids and friends will remember you more for the good times you had together and not for all the stuff that you gave them.

No matter how busy life can get…put a smile on your face and it will only be a matter of time before it becomes contagious!

Happy Saturday!

 

How to complain less and be truly content!

299122321_e9c75c89a8How many times have you looked at the things that you have and still managed to complained about everything? You complain about your finances, job, husband, friendships and pretty much everything that’s annoying you.  Complaining is something that we tend to do naturally. One day I noticed that at work I was sort of complaining more than the usual so I decided to challenge myself and see how long could I last without complaining.  I then told my co-worker and they gave me the strangest look and walked away.  This is how the challenge in my life began.

In my situation, there are layoffs happening at my job and it is very unsettling not knowing if you will be next.  The only thing that you hear all day is who got laid off or who is leaving next?  It is very stressful to be in that type of environment.  Regardless of my surroundings, I just want to stop hearing myself complain and whine.  It’s kind of annoying even to myself.  lol. As a result, I made some minor changes in hopes that I will make a difference.

1.  Distract yourself to keep your mind occupied.  This will help you stop focusing only on the negative.  When I saw co-workers gathering to complain, I went the other way or just went back to work.  It’s not that I am trying to be anti-social but just more productive.

2.  Stop being judgmental.   How many times do we judge others? Whether we complain about the bad service at the restaurant to people at work who just annoys us.  We judge others if they seem to be too perfect or too pretty.  How about changing the way you think and actually trying to look at the best in people?

3.  Find something that can make you really happy.  Pick up a new hobby, craft or a project and it can make a difference in your life.  It won’t completely eliminate your desire to complain but it can help you reduce it.  Exercising is a great outlet but there are so many other things that you can do to help youself.

Be happy with what you have because you may not know that someone else might actually want what you have.  This is in my experience but I would love to hear what your experience is.  Tell me your thoughts.

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